“Continue to Hope and Pray!”

Pastor’s Column: Rev. Brian Lee

I briefly mentioned last Sunday about what’s going on in Korea so let me use this column to share my thoughts on all the craziness that’s happening in Korea.
My heart is overwhelmed with grief, anger, and sympathy for my home country even as I write this.
I have never felt such a feeling about Korea regardless of what was happening in Korea over the last 20 years since I left Korea as a 14 year old in 1996. Maybe I was just too young and clueless to understand everything but now God is opening my eyes to see things more clearly.
It’s not a coincidence that I spoke on Nehemiah and Esther to Timothy the past two weeks. Nehemiah wept, fasted and received a calling to rebuild the wall in Jerusalem when he heard about the great trouble and disgrace of his home country (Nehemiah 1:3-4). In Esther chapter 3-4 we read that the Jews are in the verge of annihilation. When Esther was informed of the evil plot, she boldly speaks up by risking everything on the line to save all the Jews.
I heard someone say yesterday that people in Korea have lost smiles on their faces. People are not only in shock or angered by the whole situation, they are lost for HOPE. Who are they supposed to trust? Who has power to restore and set things right when the corruption has taken such a deep root in the government? Who’s going to restore the smiles on people’s faces? We find the same question in Ps 121:1 “I lift up my eyes to the mountains where does my help come from?” In the following verse we find the answer “My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.” Only God can heal, restore and make everything new. I pray and hope that people in Korea will seek God and find Him in this time of difficulty.
Let’s also continue to pray for the nation that we are living in. The election is coming up in two days. Many of might have already voted but let’s continue to lift up this nation and proclaim that God rules over this nation. In hopelessness, the hope of Jesus Christ is magnified. In darkness, the light of the Gospel will shine brighter for the whole world to see. God is calling the church to carry out its calling as a lampstand, the bearer of the light of Jesus. Let’s continue hope and pray!
“We wait in hope for the LORD; HE is our help and our shield. In HIM our hearts rejoice, for we trust in HIS holy name. May your unfailing love be with us Lord as we put our HOPE IN YOU.” (Ps 33:20-22)

Some of you might have thought that my wife and I are expecting another child from the heading. Sorry if you thought that! On Thursday, God blessed my brother’s family with a beautiful daughter Sophia! What a great joy she brought to not only her parents but to everyone who have been praying for them. For the last couple years, my brother and his wife have been trying without any positive results but God gave them a special gift as they have been patiently waiting on God for His perfect timing. It was a fresh reminder of God’s goodness and faithfulness. Before the name “Sophia” was given to the baby, she was called “웃음” (means Laughter in Korean). It’s a great Korean tradition that I should’ve followed with my own kids because I used to refer the baby as “it” at times, especially when I didn’t know the gender. I really liked the name “laughter” because it reminded me of Isaac from the bible, the fulfillment of God’s promise to Abraham and Sara. I hope and pray that that Sophia will grow up to be a special child that brings much needed laughter and joy to this world that’s filled with anger and bitterness.
I believe I have never held an infant baby other than my own because I usually don’t feel comfortable and awkward holding an infant in my arms. However, it was different this time around because Sophia is my first niece. I was actually looking forward to seeing her born and holding her in my arms. I kept on thinking about how it would feel when I actually see her in person. It was indeed a different feeling than when I held Reina and Ryan for the first time when they were born. It was more of an overwhelming appreciation for such a special gift that the whole family was waiting for over the years. Looking back on how my own kids were born just as my wife and I have planned out, I definitely took God’s grace for granted for such amazing blessings in my life. Or maybe I was too young to comprehend the full spectrum of God’s blessings but now I do. My wife and I are truly blessed beyond measures to be able to raise two beautiful kids that God placed under our care.
This whole process of Sophia being born reminded me of two important lessons. First, I was reminded of “Pray Until Something Happens (P.U.S.H.)” slogan. God challenged my lack of faith and endurance when it comes to prayer and petition. I, too often, give up on praying for certain things because of delayed response or no answer from God. I need to learn from my parents’ generation where they held onto a tree and prayed until the tree was literally uprooted from the ground. What a determination and a pure desperation they had. Some people may call them fanatics but I just love and appreciate their hunger for God and want to be more like them. 
And secondly, I was reminded of the joy of a new life being born. It says in Luke 15:10 that there is a great rejoicing in heaven when a sinner repents and comes to know Jesus Christ. Just like the birth of Sophia brought so much joy to my family, the heaven rejoices over people being saved. And that’s what the body of Christ, the church family, needs to devote more of our time and resources. So instead of focusing so much on our needs and wants, we need to turn our attention what God wants to do through us. I am thoroughly convinced that we can find the joy in our lives, the ministries we serve in, and in our families if we partake in the Kingdom business of bringing people to Christ. I pray and hope that our will be a church that brings many new lives into the family of believers. 

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
July 20, 2014

Ryan finally turned three and my wife and I are looking forward to sending him to FCS soon. However, things are not going as planned because Ryan is not yet fully potty trained. It feels like we have been trying for the entire year to get him to be ready for school. Maybe we had it too easy with Reina that we never saw this coming. I don’t know if any parents pray for their kids to be potty trained, but it’s certainly on the very top of our list. We have tried many different approaches and methods to make the whole process less stressful for Ryan but it has been a stressful time for everyone in our household. I even bought him his favorite Thomas train toilet, which helped so many other boys, but is now being used as a stool in the bathroom.
I actually went into the FCS office this morning to ask some questions and ended up asking the office staff to pray for Ryan to be potty trained before summer school starts. Mrs. May jokingly asked me whether it would be harder to evangelize to Ryan or to have him be potty trained. I replied without any hesitation, both will be about equally hard…but I feel like potty training will be harder. I know I should be more optimistic and have faith that God will bring about a good result but it’s not so easy. It’s funny how I have so much faith in bigger things in life and can’t trust God for such little thing.
Honestly, I have no idea how God is going to answer our prayer. My wife and I have our fingers crossed hoping that something will click in Ryan’s mind and be potty trained miraculously. I never imagined that I would consider potty training a “miracle.” I guess miracles do happen in and around us all the time since we all are potty trained, lol! I’m sure God wants us to learn to deal with both positive and negative outcomes. Maybe there are no positive or negative outcomes since God makes all things work for good for those who love Him. Whatever the outcome, I need to learn to accept and consider it joy. 
One of the hardest parts of this process was figuring out how to respond to Ryan’s mistakes. At times, I showed my patience and on different occasions I tried to teach him a lesson by giving him time outs and punishments. Sometimes, I feel as if he is looking to see how I will react to his mistakes. He makes me wonder whether I have what it takes to be a good parent. God is definitely using Ryan to humble me and to teach me godly wisdom and endurance. This may just be the beginning of years of stress and agony that I will have to endure as I raise up the kids but I am excited for the challenges that lie ahead. Please pray for me and don’t forget to pray for Ryan that he would be potty trained by mid-June so he can attend summer school. 

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
May 4, 2014

It’s that time of the year! For those of you who are not familiar with “March Madness” it refers to the NCAA men & women’s division 1 basketball championship tournament that happens in March every year. It seems like March Madness is something that gets the whole nation pumped up and excited like the Superbowl. People are filling out the tournament brackets to see if they can guess the outcome of the tournament. For this year’s tournament, Warren Buffett has offered a 1 billion dollar prize for a perfect bracket. The odds of filling out the perfect bracket are 1 in 9.2 quintillion. For next year’s tournament, maybe I should go to the Media and throw out a big amount of money prize for the perfect bracket because the chances of someone winning that prize is almost zero.
As I was driving home from work on Wednesday, I heard a debate on the radio on who each person thought was going to win the tournament. There were 5 men involved in this debate and each person sounded so intelligent that I was amazed by how much information each person knew about each basketball team represented in the tournament. These people truly deserve to be called experts and if someone was to guess the perfect bracket, it would be one of these people for sure.  
However, if you have ever been through March Madness before, you know there is always the “upset” factor that messes up everyone’s bracket, including the experts’.  Since I started following March Madness, there has always been at least one upset that messed up everyone’s brackets. This year’s tournament started out with a huge upset and there were at least 2 more upsets on the first day of the tournament alone. How ridiculous is that! How are we supposed to get the perfect bracket and win the billion dollar prize with all these “upset” factors?! I guess that’s the beauty of “March Madness” that draws me in.
Who’s your top pick for this year’s March Madness? Although I didn’t fill out a complete bracket this year, I am hoping for either Kansas or Kentucky to be the winner of this year’s tournament. I know Kentucky may not be the best pick but I think they have so much talent and potential to be the winners. I guess we will find out in a week!
Being surrounded by so much uncertainty in life, I am reminded of the confidence and hope in Jesus Christ. There is no “upset” for us because Jesus Christ has already won the battle for us on the cross. We just have to trust in Him and walk victoriously. How awesome it is to know that we will all receive the prize that God set before us whether we live a perfect life or not!  

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
March 23, 2014

I usually try to take care of family duties on Mondays. Well, I should say that’s what is expected of me because I am not home much on the weekends due to ministry stuff.  At times, my wife writes “TO-DO” lists so that I don’t become lazy and waste the whole day. Although I complain that she expects too much from me, I do appreciate her so much for being a “super mom” and that she constantly challenges me to become a better husband and father. God has indeed blessed me beyond measures with a perfect partner to share my life with. I am forever grateful for her… except for the days when we get into fights and end up not talking for a couple days or so. Yes, as a pastor, I should know better not to let the sun go down while we are still angry at each other (Eph 4:26). But it doesn’t always happen that way.    
As a result of a recent conflict with my wife, I had a bad incident this past Monday morning. She didn’t notify me of our minivan being very low on fuel so the car just died on me right after I buckled the kids into their car seats to take them to school. After spending so much time and effort in the freezing weather to pump in gas, my hands were all frozen and I spilled gas all over my hands. So I was very annoyed at myself for not properly resolving conflicts with my wife because my wife would have warned me of the low fuel light on our “normal” days. She probably forgot to mention it because we didn’t talk to each other for the entire weekend. To add to my frustration, even Reina was annoyed at me that she was late to her school. And why did it happen on the day that my parents and my sister went out early in the morning for a hospital visit? Everything just didn’t go right for me on that morning all because I failed to deal with unresolved conflicts with my wife.
How do you resolve conflicts? There is an article that I came across that presents 5 different ways people resolve conflicts. Find out which one you can identify with and learn the “carefronting” way to preserve relationships. (Refer to the source for more detailed explanation)
 
The Win-Lose Strategy: Seeing everything as right or wrong. No “gray” whatsoever.
Avoidance: May end up with weal and superficial relationship. Avoiding conflict at all costs in often a sign of weakness and insecurity.
Giving In: Yielding to others to maintain peace. People pleasers
Compromise: Sometimes both parties may give up something important to them and high risk of ending up unsatisfied and unhappy.
Carefronting: The two parties must agree to come together, commit to preserve the relationship, creatively find a solution that satisfies both sides, utilize reason over emotion, separate the person from the issue, and strive for a solution that will bring peace. 
Source: <http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/trevinwax/2013/08/13/5-western-styles-of-managing-conflict/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=5-western-styles-of-managing-conflict&repeat=w3tc>

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
February 2, 2014

I wanted to share a post that I came across on Facebook this past week. This made me reflect on my priorities and my role as a father and a husband. Hope you enjoy!
SON: "Daddy, may I ask you a question?"
DAD: "Yeah sure, what is it?"
SON: "Daddy, how much do you make an hour?"
DAD: "That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?"
SON: "I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?"
DAD: "If you must know, I make $100 an hour."
SON: "Oh! (With his head down).
SON: "Daddy, may I please borrow $50?"
The father was furious.
DAD: "If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I work hard every day for such this childish behavior."

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $ 50 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.

DAD: "Are you asleep, son?"
SON: "No daddy, I'm awake".
DAD: "I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier. It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $50 you asked for."

The little boy sat straight up, smiling.
SON: "Oh, thank you daddy!"
Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills. The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

DAD: "Why do you want more money if you already have some?"
SON: "Because I didn't have enough, but now I do.

"Daddy, I have $100 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you."
The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness. It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that $100 worth of your time with someone you love? If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family and friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than to our family.

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
July 28, 2013

This is the column I wrote for last week:
I had a conversation with Mike Chung during a Timothy teachers’ meeting whether to do something special for the Father’s Day. We were mourning over the fact that there is always a huge hype over Mother's Day but we seem to just skim over Father's day without much celebration. Every Mother’s Day has been filled with special events and the church even sells special corsages for mothers. But we, the fathers, do not get anything special on Father’s days. As the conversation went on, I began to think about how the children usually do not appreciate their dads as much as their moms, especially when they are young. Perhaps one of the reasons is that the children see and receive more tangible love from their mothers. Mothers in general, are more closely involved with children's life whereas fathers tend to be less involved in their kids' life because of work schedule and other obligations. However, we know fathers have a very important role of bringing security and stability to their families. These are the situations that I see in many families but certainly do not apply to every family. So don’t be offended if you are a mother or a father who’s totally different from what I described above.

As i think back to my childhood, I remember my mom always being around. She was there to send me off to school in the morning, cook me a warm meal, dressed me in proper attire until i was old enough to take care of myself. Disciplining can spanking were almost exclusively done by mom except for a couple times when i got into major trouble and dad had to step in with a stronger force. However, as I entered middle school, I started to notice my dad being more involved in my life. I am not so sure whether he was intentionally doing it but my dad came into my life at a critical time when I needed him the most. Being a typical middle child did not help as I was going through the teenage years. I always felt incompetent in everything and felt like I didn’t get enough love and attention when my siblings were always the focal point of our family.
Whether my dad was being intentional or not didn’t really matter because he was able to embrace my longing to receive more love. He was exceptionally encouraging to me, or at least I felt like it. He not only talked about love, he went over and beyond in my opinion to carry out his love for me and my family. I simply cannot get into all the details in this short writing, but I have so many good memories of my dad within the first 2 years of my middle school years when our relationship was taken up to a whole new level. It has never been the same ever since. As I realized how much this man love me and cares for me, I not only became a good son, my attitude towards life and myself completely changed.
As I get older and became a father, I am appreciating the sacrifice and love my father poured upon my life even more. I pray and hope that I can show the kind of love that my father showed me to my own kids. It will be a true challenge but a worthy one because I want my kids to have the same love and respect for me as their father that I have for my own father.

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
June 23, 2013

There is a wise saying in Korea that goes something like this “The school dog will begin to recite literature after three years being there” which means even a dog can master something after years of being around school. I find this to be true in everything in my life whether I pick up a hobby or try to learn a new instrument. But when it comes to parenting, it’s a totally different issue. I’ve been a father for more than six years now but I am nowhere near “mastering” parenting. I took many classes in seminary on parenting and family matters but whatever I learned and read for the classes don’t seem to help me out much when it comes to parenting my own children. My wife and I often talk about our kids’ behaviors and try to come up with ways to handle them wisely but we don’t seem to have all the answers.
As Ryan begins to talk, understand and express himself, we are finding out that he is completely different from Reina when she was at his age. For the most part, Reina was a very complacent child. She used to sit in her exersaucer for a long time while her parents took care of chores around the house. She was very good at following orders and receiving correction when she did something wrong. However, Ryan is so different from his sister. My wife and I tried to correct Ryan’s misbehaviors through many different methods but what used to work with Reina is not working with him. After all, I guess it’s true that boys are tougher to handle than girls when they are young. The more time I spend with my kids, I realize how difficult it must’ve been for my parents to raise three children in an environment so much worse than now. Don’t get me wrong, my frustration with Ryan is not because he is totally defiant and messed up. In fact, my wife and I both agree that Ryan is so much sweeter than his sister at this age.
The reason why I decided to share about Ryan is because I had an incident this past week. Ryan did something wrong and I was giving him a “time-out.” Since Ryan is still very young, he is not so good at staying still even during a time-out, but I wanted to make sure that he knew that he was being disciplined for something he did wrong. So I put him in a corner and made him face the wall even as he resisted and giggled thinking I was playing a game with him. After a long battle of keeping him against the wall, I realized how silly I was as I sat there trying to teach him a lesson in that manner. I clearly knew it was my pride and ego wanting my young son to know that I am in charge. Ryan ended up saying sorry and hugged me which felt good but I had mixed feelings of whether I am being a good father to my son.
That night, I went to a leadership meeting at church and we talked about God’s characters and read Psalm 103:8 “The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.” As soon as I read that verse, I couldn’t help but think back to my incident with Ryan that I had before I came to church. We went on to talk about how our own children establish their view of the “Father God” through their earthly father. I had to repent for what I did to Ryan earlier. Even though he deserved punishment for his wrongdoing, I could have displayed the characters of God instead of being so easily irritated. If parenting is all about displaying godly character so my children can see the Father God through me, I certainly am far away from mastering it. I am so determined to do my best to be the best father I can be for my children so they will not only have a good image of me, but God as being compassionate, gracious, slow to anger and abounding in love.  

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
June 2, 2013

My family had a very special day this past Wednesday because my parents became proud citizens of the United States of America. Our family emigrated from Korea in 1996 and it took about 17 years for my parents to finally to obtain their citizenship. I wish I could post a picture of them holding up their citizenship certificate to let you know how bright their faces were at their swearing-in ceremony. Many of our EC congregation members probably don't have this special experience of obtaining citizenship but all my siblings and I went through it and we know how difficult the process can be. My parents had to go through a special process of applying for a special exception to bring in an interpreter and have testing in Korean. With all the complications they had to go through even during their interview, including switching out my mom's translator, I was very proud of my parents for studying and prepping for the last six months and passing their interviews and tests on their first try.

I am thankful that my kids didn't have to go through any of what I had to go through to earn their citizenship. They just had to be born here in the U.S. Reina and Ryan will never be asked to bring copies of their citizenship certificates because they don't even own any. They both have a birth certificate to prove their genuine citizenship. In the same way, the citizenship of heaven is given to an individual who's born again in Christ.  You don't have to take any tests or go through the long process of applying for an interview. How amazing is that?! Aren’t you thankful that God doesn’t make you work for your citizenship of heaven? You and I simply had to put our faith in Christ for the work HE has done for us. 

However, we are also well aware of how much work it takes to lead someone to Christ.  Some of you may know, my father-in-law is not a Christian. He hasn’t been to church for more than 10 years. It’s been one of our major prayer requests for many years. God impressed in my heart through this year’s lent season to start a family service at his house. Ever since we started it in April, we have not missed one Sunday evening thus far, praise God! We are praying and hoping that the family services will eventually lead my father-in-law to come out to the church and become a citizen of heaven. It will not be so easy but we trust in God that the good work HE has started in us, at the right time, HE will bring it to completion. We are waiting and praying for that day to come soon because that day is indeed a special day to celebrate. We are looking forward to that day when my father-in-law becomes a citizen of heaven. It will definitely be infinitely more special than my parents obtaining a citizenship of the U.S. Please remember to pray for us every Sunday at 6 pm.

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
May 19, 2013

I felt in love with the game of basketball ever since I came to the States. It helped me get through the troublesome teenage years as a way of relieving stress. However, it wasn't just for that reason that i played basketball, I really enjoyed playing basketball. During the high school years, my cousins and I always played basketball whenever we got together. Since we all went to the same church, we often played after Friday night services. We sometimes went to a neighborhood park and played basketball with our car headlights on for hours before we were told by police to go home. There were times when we went out to a church basketball tournaments where we experienced both victories and terrible defeats.

Even when I went to college, my passion for basketball did not cool down. I went to the gym at least a couple days a week, not to lift weights, but to shoot around or to play pick up games. Since my new friends at college did not play basketball much, I had to play by myself for most of the time but I didnt mind at all because I loved every minute of it.

When I first came to NCFC as a 23 year old young adult, I was able to use my passion and love for basketball as a vital tool for the Timothy ministry. I connected right away with teachers and students who shared the same passion for basketball. People opened up their life through playing basketball together.  However, God convicted me many times that basketball has become more than a hobby for me. I loved it so much that I could not live without it. When NBA season came around, I was glued to my TV watching basketball every night. If I missed any games on TV,  I would look up highlights of the games on ESPN and on NBA homepage to make sure I catch up. Yes, you can say basketball was an idol that I loved more than God.

These past few weeks, I noticed many of our EC men (including Timothy) talk about the NFL draft. What amazed me was that people knew so much about each prospects and their potentials. Everyone sounded like the commentators on ESPN news. It was clear to me that football was more than a hobby for many guys at our church just like basketball was and still is more than a hobby for me. What about you? Do you have any activities or hobbies that you can identify as an idol in your life? Perhaps we can use this month of fasting and prayer to deal with the idols of our lives.

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
May 5, 2013

Don't you have moments in your life when you just break out in laughter as a result of an enlightenment or a revelation from God? I had one this week as I wrote this column. As soon as I wrote down the title, God struck me with a thought that made me chuckle with a big smile on my face. He impressed this thought in my heart: "You thought you didn't have to commit to the 40 days of prayer and fasting since we didn't have an early morning prayer campaign for the lent season this year...well I had a different plan in mind."
Though we are going through a difficult time as a church, I am seeing a lot of positive results springing up from everywhere. People are coming out to morning prayer and other prayer meetings more than before.
God told Solomon in 2 Chronicles 7:14 "If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land".
In response to God's call, we declared 40 days of Prayer and Fasting chain for the whole church and asked people to sign up to fast and pray at least one meal a day. The prayer and fasting chain already kicked off on 4/22 (Mon) and many are already participating in it together. However, I know many of you needed more time to think and plan before signing up so we will give you another opportunity to sign up today. Please fill in your name on the calendar posted in the hallway right outside the worship center.
On top of individual fasting and prayer, the church leadership wanted to provide opportunities for the people to come together and pray corporately because we believe there's a special unity and power that arise from corporate prayer meetings. Since we already have many weekday/weekend services and prayer meetings for different campuses and ministries, each congregation (MD, VA) will have a different schedule. Our intention is to have a corporate prayer time EVERYDAY for ONE HOUR for the whole month of May at both campuses. A new prayer meeting will be added for days that we don’t have church services and prayer meetings. Some meeting will be KC & EC joint with English translation. It would be nice to have all prayer meetings be KC & EC joint, but it requires too much coordination for such short meetings and the prayer time wouldn’t be as smooth. So most of the meetings will be held in one language. See below for a detail schedule of the prayer meetings. However, you are welcome to come and join any of the prayer meetings because God can understand all languages!

Schedule of the Additional prayer meetings (Monday, April 29th – Thursday, May 30)
MD Campus KC & EC (7:30 - 8:30 pm)
Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays  (Worship Center)
*will be in Korean – short message in Korean, and corporate prayer for most of the time

VA Campus KC & EC (7:30 pm -8:30 pm)
KC: Mondays, Tuesday    EC:: Wednesday   (Worship Center)   Joint: Friday (Connection Cafe)

From Pastor Brian’s Heart
April 28, 2013