The other day I almost got into a car accident because I was distracted. No, it wasn’t because I was texting (although that is very dangerous – seriously!). No, it wasn’t because I was dancing like a madman to my favorite Kpop song (also dangerous both for car accidents and pride). It was because I saw a white nose hair in my rearview mirror and was trying to pull it out.
Now, I’m used to white hairs. I’ve had a bunch, mostly in the back of my head, since I was 10. This always led to interesting conversations on the first day of classes where inevitably, whoever was sitting behind me would tap me on the shoulder and ask, “Do you know you have white hair?” To which I would always reply, “Your breath smells,” and turn back around. I was quite popular in high school.
But a white nose hair was a first! And I was so shocked at seeing it that I had to pull it out the instant I glimpsed it, in order to a) verify its existence and b) commiserate at my getting older.
I’m not a guy who gets caught up in getting older. If I die, I die. It’s ok, I have life insurance. And frankly, I don’t “feel” old – I’m still “cool,” right, Timothy? Actually, just asking that question probably precludes me from being “cool.” Nevermind, Timothy, I don’t care what you think. (That’s a “cool” attitude, right?) But even though I never cared about getting older, for some reason this white nose hair was really bothering me and got me freaked out. I started wondering if I had reached the halfway point of my life. Would I be able to see my sons graduate college? Would I be able to see them move into my basement after graduating college? Would I ever have my retirement home in beautiful New Jersey? Those are all jokes – of course I’m going to retire to New Jersey, don’t be ridiculous.
I did spend a lot of time thinking about my sons though. Josiah is 2 and Connor is 0. They’ve got such a long way to go and I started thinking about what kind of men they’d be when they grow up. What they would look like (hopefully mom), what their personalities would be like (hopefully mom). What careers they would have, who they would marry, what their OWN kids would be like. I was getting so deep into it that I actually had to stop and remind myself that my kids still poop in their own pants. “Slow down, David. Before you start worrying about your grandkids, why not enjoy the time you have with them now?”
This reminded me of Dr. Shamblin’s message last year about understanding the times in our lives where we find ourselves in the spiritual desert. How instead of focusing on the promised land, we should be focused on where we are currently at and what God is doing in our lives at THIS moment versus what may happen tomorrow. No matter where we are or what we’re going through, God is very purposeful in the situations we find ourselves in, and there’s always a purpose for God. Oftentimes, we focus so much on the future and worry about what could or could not be that we don’t get to enjoy or learn from what we have in front of us right now. For me, freaking out about my kids’ futures would preclude me from enjoying their toddler years now. Tomorrow will come, with all of its worries and stresses whether I want it or not. But what I do know is that His grace is sufficient for me today… and it will be tomorrow, too.
All this from a white nose hair that turned out to be a booger. Go figure.
From Pastor David’s Heart
August 17, 2014